Twenny Twenny Twenny Four Hours to Go

There are now fewer than twenty-four hours left in the year 2007 (as I write this in the Pacific time zone).

This time tomorrow, it's going to be all champagne and people mumbling along to "Auld Lang Syne" (because, seriously, does anyone actually know the words to that thing anymore?) and fireworks.

Then, it's going to be hour-long waits for tables at Denny's for passable eggs and sausage and terrible coffee to kill the hangover and fill the awkward silences between people who barely remember what they did with each other after the party. That, and the Rose Parade.

The day after, it's going to be all, "This is the year I lose weight" and "This year, I'm resolving to quit smoking, and this time, I really mean it."

Then it's going to be LSU smoking the Buckeyes in the BCS Title Game.

And then, before you know it, it's going to be December 31, 2008, and you'll be wondering where another year went.


In this space last year at this time, you may recall that I made some resolutions. Let's take a look back and see how I did:

I resolve to watch old-school Star Trek reruns whenever possible.

Done, and with very little difficulty.

I resolve to give my D&D players something more interesting to do than fight yet another band of Orcs.

Not done. I had depressingly few opportunities for gaming this year.

I resolve not to bitch too much about Spider-Man 3, no matter how much it sucks.

It sucked about as much as I thought it would, which was some, and I feel I successfully kept my complaints to a minimum, especially compared to the "It's the worst movie ever!" hue and cry raised by the internet nerdosphere.

I resolve to catch up on reading the nerdy essentials I've been meaning to get around to for years, the Arthur C. Clarke, the Kim Stanley Robinson, the Robert Heinlein, and not spend all the time I could be doing that rereading "Watchmen" and old Batman comics.

Well, I don't think I read "Watchmen" cover-to-cover once this year...but I certainly didn't read any Clarke, Robinson or Heinlein cover-to-cover either.

I resolve to incorporate at least 15% more "Simpsons" references into my daily conversation.

Nope, don't think I managed it.

I resolve not to spend September and October getting needlessly excited about the Denver Broncos' Super Bowl chances, and instead skip directly to the inevitable jaded letdown that usually accompanies November and December.

I'd like to extend a heartfelt thanks to the Boys in Predominantly Orange for sucking balls right out of the gate this season, making this one of the easiest resolutions ever to keep.

I resolve to get one o' them Wiis or XBoxes or PlayStations or whatever that the nerds are all excited about these days. Or not.

Nope. Maybe next year.

I resolve to wear more humorous t-shirts.*

Failure. I'm finding very few so-called "humorous" t-shirts to my liking these days, and I go more and more to plain, unadorned ones in a variety of hues.

I resolve to determine once and for all whether the Jedi Knights could beat the Green Lantern Corps in an all-out fight.

What a silly resolution! This one's like the age-old question about how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop: the world may never know.

I resolve to get a new pair of Chuck Taylors and wear them until they are little more than a loosely connected string of shoe molecules.

Working on it. The ones I bought this year have leather uppers and are proving surprisingly resilient. I think I may wear through the soles before the uppers, which would be a first.

I resolve to be prolific in the creation of webcomics, hilarious cartoons for YouTube distribution, snarky blog entries, and other such things associated with the modern, well-connected nerd.

Webcomics? Sadly, no. Snarky blog entries? Well, you be the judge.

I resolve to see at least one embarrassingly, horrifyingly nerdy movie in a theater this summer, whatever this year's equivalent of Alien vs. Predator might be. If there's more than one to see, so much the better.

Well, I never did make it to Live Free or Die Hard, and I had no idea when I wrote this that this year's equivalent of Alien vs. Predator would, in fact, be Alien vs. Predator: Requiem. But, sadly, I'm leaving the country for two weeks and I suspect that AvP:R will be long gone from theaters by the time I get back.

I resolve to spend many, many hours playing complex boardgames with rulebooks longer than an average Victor Hugo novel.


I resolve to build a functioning trebuchet at my friend's cabin this summer.

Sigh...maybe next summer.

I resolve to learn the ancient art of Tae Kwan Leap. Boot to the head!

Well, you know what they say: Tae Kwan Leap is not a path to a door, but a road leading neverending unto the horizon. To a true student, a year is as a day.

I resolve, in short, to be the kind of nerd that makes other nerds proud to be nerds.

I can only hope that I have done this.

On the whole, I believe I've accomplished quite a lot, nerdistically speaking, in 2007, and things are looking bright for 2008.